


With the Thaw

by Fantasticmuse



Category: Kairos series - L'Engle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-20
Updated: 2009-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-04 17:06:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/32480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fantasticmuse/pseuds/Fantasticmuse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I have an assignment," he said when they caught up to him. He turned to look at them. "You can't come with."</p>
            </blockquote>





	With the Thaw

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Jamie Dakin](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Jamie+Dakin).



> Happy Yule!

In the spring, Calvin took to running out to the Murray home from his own house. The weather had cleared; the spring sun easily took care of the last of the snow and had done a fair job at drying the muddy ground and gravel roads. The fresh air felt good on his skin and in his lungs.

As he neared the Murray's, he saw the small form of Charles Wallace out in the yard, tossing a stick for Fort. The boy seemed to have been waiting for Calvin, because he turned expectantly to the road and raised a hand in greeting.

It seemed odd to Calvin to see Charles Wallace so well and happy only a season after he'd nearly died. The winter hadn't been particularly hard on them, after the whole ordeal with mitochondria. School, Calvin had taken to calling it mentally, School with a capital and sometimes even italics.

He would've liked to laugh about how quickly things returned to normal after that fall, but it seemed they'd all agreed, without speaking or kything, to keep it mostly unmentioned. Charles Wallace was faring better in school. The boys in his class being quite taken with Louise the Larger when Charles brought her in to his class at the beginning of the school year. Nevertheless, he still didn't have any proper friends, but Calvin suspected that was going to be the case for quite some time. And anyway, he had Meg.

Calvin slowed to a stop in front of Charles Wallace, breathing deeply from the exertion. He never timed his runs, just ran at whatever pace felt like the best for that day. Charles Wallace regarded him seriously; Calvin felt an urge to ruffle his hair and call him 'kid' but the moment quickly passed.

"Will you keep a secret?" Charles Wallace asked without preamble. Calvin frowned. He knew the kind of secrets a boy like Charles Wallace might keep and the idea concerned him.

"Depends on the secret," he answered. "And I can't guarantee too keep it from Meg."

If his answer disappointed Charles Wallace, it didn't show on his face. "You won't need to, not for long. It's a good secret." Fort, apparently tired of waiting on humans to throw the stick for him, barked once and took the stick out of Charles Wallace's hand. He let it go and turned towards the house. "I'll tell you about it at the star watching rock. Meg will be home soon." The last statement he said with a solemn certainty and Calvin didn't bother to ask how he knew.

**

Charles Wallace was not his little brother and not at all like the brothers he did have. The only thing they had in common was Calvin's feelings-- his brothers and Meg's brother were easy to love but difficult to understand. Even then, Calvin's trouble understanding stemmed from vastly different places.

Charles Wallace stretched out on the star watching rock. "My secret is that I'm going to School."

Calvin blinked, once, not understanding Charles Wallace's meaning at first. But his words carried a certain weight, and Calvin knew he didn't mean the elementary school in the village.

"Since when?" He asked, curious. "Do you have a new Teacher?"

"Since I got better. Earlier this spring. Louise is one of my Teachers, now." Charles Wallace bounced his feet against the rock in uncharacteristic fidgety excitement. "I'm learning a lot."

"Louise the doctor or Louise the snake?" Calvin couldn't help but ask. It seemed so long ago that their whole ordeal had taken place, but the self-imposed silence about the matter meant he felt an illicit thrill even when simply conversing about it.

Charles Wallace smiled. "Both, really. But the human Louise is really more _my_ Teacher."

Calvin said nothing. He had learned that particular response was best when confronted with something odd coming from Charles Wallace. But as he thought back over the past months, he recalled Dr. Colubra's frequent visits. At first they ostensibly occurred to check on Charles Wallace's health. But the doctor had been a guest for dinner several times since then, always with a close eye on Charles Wallace.

Calvin had assumed her visits were ordinary. And yet, as with so much in the Murray household, what looked ordinary was most certainly not.

Next to him on the rock, Charles Wallace tilted his head, then looked back in the direction of the house. "Meg is on her way."

Calvin automatically looked behind him, but Meg was not yet in sight. "Am I still keeping your secret?"

"For a few minutes," Charles Wallace replied with a wave of his hand. "I want to be the one to tell her."

Sure enough, after a few more moments of silence between the two on the star watching rock, Calvin could hear Meg's footsteps drawing nearer. He sat up on the rock and turned to welcome her to their odd little party. When he did, he saw her stormy expression and held back the teasing greeting he had intended to give her. He knew that look well, though she had been wearing less of it lately, and it could mean only one of two things: trouble at school or trouble with Charles Wallace.

Calvin was really fond of that look. "Hello, Meg."

Her frown softened when she looked at him. "I didn't know you were here. And I thought someone had run off with Charles Wallace." She directed her gaze at her brother, who had once again stretched out on the rock. "I was expecting you out front."

"I'm sorry I worried you, Meg." Charles Wallace's response was so solemn and serious that Calvin would have laughed to hear it come out of any other child's mouth.

Meg huffed a sigh and clambered over the rock to sit between her brother and Calvin. "What's going on?"

"I have a new Teacher." Calvin could see that Meg, too, took a moment to process _Teacher_ for what it really was. She sat very still for a long moment.

"I think I knew," she said at last. She put one arm around her brother. He still looked small for his age, but he had grown an inch or two over the winter. Calvin watched them quietly and tried to ignore the small pinches of jealousy that pricked in his chest and stomach. The idea of him holding Whippy the way Meg held Charles Wallace almost made him snort with laughter, but being so close with a family member seemed nice.

Above Charles Wallace's head, Meg smiled at him. Calvin felt his face grow a little warm.

Charles Wallace pushed away from Meg. "Okay, it's time. Let's go."

"Time for what?" Meg asked, but Charles Wallace was already walking towards the woods. They had no choice but to follow.

**

As they approached the edge of the wood, Calvin took Meg's hand. She jumped slightly and looked at him but relaxed after a moment. Charles Wallace was not too far in front of them, his light blue spring jacket easily visible between the trees a few hundred yards ahead.

Suddenly, he stopped. Calvin hurried his pace to catch up and felt Meg do the same. When they reached Charles Wallace, he was staring intently at a red oak tree. It was so impossibly huge that Calvin wondered just exactly how he had missed seeing it before. Charles Wallace stood in front of it with one hand pressed against the bark.

"I have an assignment," he said when they caught up to him. He turned to look at them. "You can't come with."

"What?" Meg cried and tore her hand from Calvin's. She quickly closed the distance to Charles Wallace. "Why can't we go? What are you doing?"

Charles Wallace shook his head. "I don't know yet."

"But is it dangerous?" Meg's voice was pitched high with worry. Calvin had been wondering the same thing. His stomach twisted at the idea of Charles Wallace going alone into anything like he and Meg had experienced the autumn before.

Instead of answering his sister, Charles Wallace just shrugged. Calvin was afraid he knew what the boy was saying-- of course it's dangerous. It always is.

A fierce and unexpected desire to protect both Charles Wallace and Meg rose within Calvin. "I won't let you go alone, Charles Wallace."

"Of course not," Meg interjected. But nevertheless, she had drawn back from her brother and closer to Calvin.

Charles Wallace hadn't moved his hand from the trunk of the tree. He looked directly at Calvin. "You must not try to follow me. Learning is dangerous, but I have to do it."

"I can't let you," Calvin said again, surprised at his own intensity. "I just found my real family, I don't want to lose it."

As soon as he said it, he felt Meg staring at him. He realized how it must have sounded to her, and all the things he never told her about the O'Keefes that she could probably have assumed. But he'd never _told_ her and suddenly that was all he wanted to do.

Meg looked slowly from Calvin back to Charles Wallace, as though she were having a revelation of her own. "Promise me you'll be safe," she told him.

Charles Wallace hesitated.

"Promise me." Her voice was clear and calm.

"I have the best Teachers in the universe. I'll be as safe as I can." Charles Wallace had begun to look more upset, but somehow also more resolved. "I'm sorry, but I have to study alone for a while, it's important."

"How long is a while?" Calvin reached out for Meg's hand again.

"I don't know. Right now it should only be a few hours. But my lessons...I think I'll be learning all my life."

Meg gave a little laugh, a hysterical sound. "You sound like an adult, talking about learning and the future."

Charles Wallace only shrugged once more. It took everything in Calvin's willpower not to simply go over to the boy and carry him bodily back to the house where he would be safe and sound. Instead, he decided to give Meg a hug. "I think he's going whether we want him to or not, Meg."

Meg nodded miserably. Charles Wallace, who had been watching them, suddenly seemed to be staring through them, or into them, and when he spoke it was with a voice that sounded like his, but deeper and clearer-- with age and weight.

"I have to go," he said. "But I will come home. I'll need your help. I need you to make a home for me to go to. A fixed point." He blinked, and didn't seem to recall that he had just spoken. "I have to go now," he repeated.

Behind him, where his palm was touching the rough bark a pale green and gold light seemed to shimmer. The light grew brighter and brighter until both Meg and Calvin blinked. And in that instant, Charles Wallace was gone.

It should have frightened him. But in his mind he saw the birth of a star and all he felt was joy. The look on Meg's face told him she was feeling the same way-- as though they had been waiting for this moment the whole winter, frozen in time, and now with the thaw things were as they should be. There was no other way.

"He'll come home," Meg said, and took Calvin's hand.


End file.
